“It couldn’t have been more than a minute, but it felt as though it was a lifetime. The entire interaction couldn’t have lasted more than ten minutes. Not long enough for anyone to miss me in the bar, but it was just after the kicks stopped I heard someone say, ‘hi Billy.’ My ears were ringing with pain and my eyes were such a mess of tears I couldn’t make out who it was.
“I felt such great relief someone had come to stop the kicking, that I wasn’t processing what else was happening. Then I heard a hard thud and the sound of air evacuating someone’s lungs. It was as though I heard what I had felt moments before. Something fell into the empty kegs I had been sitting on.
“Then someone was helping me up and gentle hands that smelled of dirt and cut grass were wiping tears from my cheeks as I was guided toward the door of the Tavern. My arms ached and my stomach hurt where the first blows had landed. I limped, already feeling the bruises on my legs, but I could walk. I wasn’t steady, but I could move.
“The invisible voice said, ‘get back behind the bar. Try to make it look like nothing bad has happened. It’ll be easier if no one thinks anything happened to you.’ The voice stank with the heat of hard alcohol.
“Still not thinking straight, but now moving, I eased my way through the door into the hazy fluorescent interior of the bar. I made it to the bathroom unnoticed and did what I could at the sink to make myself presentable.
“The tear-stained face in the mirror was unrecognizable. My eyes were puffy, and dark bruises were forming on my arms. I cleaned my face as best I could, took a deep breath and headed back to the bar.
“I had just made it back behind the bar, hoping Pap wouldn’t notice the bruises on my arms, when the backdoor slammed open and Billy stumbled into the room. Every head in the room turned toward him as he tripped toward his father’s table at the front. ‘Santiago hit me!’ he bawled at his father. At which point, Santiago stepped through the backdoor, a drunken bemused smile upon on his face.
“Mr. Braithwaite nodded at Big Mike Tatum who got up from his stool at the bar and made his way toward Santiago.
“Before Mike reached him, Santiago shot a quick look at me and a small smile of apology hinted at the corner of his mouth, then he turned his attention back to Big Mike.
“’Hey Big Mike, destroyed any lives today?’ he asked in a voice the whole bar could hear, ‘yeah, I know you kept pushing for more, even after my father gave you everything.’ Santiago looked over Mike’s shoulder at the well-to-do of Berwick seated at the tables, ‘you’re all responsible for the death of this town, the death of the mills and the death of my father,’ he condemned them and turned his gaze back to Mike. ‘And you’re the worst of the bunch because you should have known better. You saw the place day in and day out and you knew. You knew what he was going through and still you demanded more money, more benefits, more time off and he gave it all to you with no questions asked.
“’My father loved you and everyone else who worked in the mills and for the company. He did everything and would have done anything for all of you, for the this town, and you kept leeching him until there was nothing left, but that wasn’t enough so he died and you scraped at the memory of his name –‘
“And then Mike hit him. It happened so fast, I didn’t see his arm move. He had Santiago in his arms and was out the back door in an instant. Everyone inside the bar was quiet. Even Billy had stopped his whimpering.
“We heard multiple impacts, two loud grunts and then the sound of something crashing into the metal trash cans lining the Tavern’s back wall.
“Pap had risen from his stool at the sound of the first grunt and was at the backdoor when the body crashed into the cans. ‘That’s enough Mike,’ he said. I’d never heard the iron in his voice like that before. I was afraid of it. ‘Linda, ice and two Buds,’ he said over his shoulder to me, then he was out the backdoor.
“While I scooped ice into a towel, Mike came back in and took his seat at the bar. He took a pile of cocktail napkins and wiped blood from the knuckles of his massive right hand.
“I grabbed two Buds from the cooler and made my way to the backdoor. I felt every eye in the bar on my back. When I got out into the thick night air a wave of relief washed over me. I hadn’t realized the tension I was feeling inside the bar.
“Pap was bent over the trash cans helping Santiago to his feet. Once he had him upright, Pap moved him over towards the kegs on the other side of the door and sat him where I had been sitting earlier.
“’He was hurting,’ Santiago stammered, my name failing to materialize through the mouthful of blood.
“’Just sit and be quiet a minute,’ Pap said, taking the two Buds from me and handing one to Santiago. He tilted his own back and finished it in one go, then walked back to the door. He opened it and yelled to Kenny to ‘put a round for the whole place on my tab.’ Then he turned back to me and said, ‘you stay here, I’m going to get the truck.’
“I knelt down beside Santiago and handed him the ice-filled towel. He tried to smile his thanks but his face twisted into pain. He held the ice to his mouth and mumbled ‘thank you.’
“I smiled my own thanks into his bleary bloodshot eyes and wondered what would have happened if he hadn’t come outside. I wanted to say more, but I didn’t have the words. We stared at each other in silence until Pap pulled up out back in the truck.
“Pap didn’t say a word as he lifted Santiago to his feet and helped him in to the passenger side of the truck. Once he was settled, pap came around to the driver’s side. He put a hand on my shoulder and looked at me with a pained tenderness, ‘we’ll talk about this later,’ he said.
“I went back in to work. Silence greeted me as I came through the door. The sound of Kenny mixing the last of the drinks from the round Pap had bought. There were no hidden stares. Every eye in the room was on me as I made my way back to the bar.
“I don’t know if anyone knew or suspected what had happened to me out back, but I stared hard back at each table as I made my way toward the bar. When my eyes found Billy Braithwaite’s table, he wouldn’t look up to meet them and instead sat squirming beneath my gaze.
“I ducked back behind the bar, Kenny boomed out ‘order up’ and I got back to work. At the appearance of normalcy, the rest of the room returned to its respective conversations. Kenny raised his eyebrows at the bruises on my arms, but I shook my head and he knew better than to push for answers.
“The rest of the night was quiet, though the energy had gone out of the place. Kenny and I wiped down the bar, cleaned the taps and put up the chairs in silence.
“I was nervous about getting home. I was afraid Billy might be waiting. He and his friends had shuffled out right after last call. It was a well-known fact that I walked home from work in the summer. I was nervous he’d be lurking somewhere on the route.
“When we came out the back of the Tavern I was about to ask Kenny for a ride, when I saw Pap parked across the street in his truck. A huge wave of relief washed over me. I said my goodnight to Kenny and climbed in besides Pap.
“He put the truck in gear and we drove home in silence. I took quick glances at him and saw the way he was working something over in his head. I was afraid he was angry with me. It wasn’t until we were parked outside the cottage he spoke.
“’Linda, I don’t want your Ma to know a thing about tonight.’ I started to protest, but he raised a hand, ‘I know she’ll hear gossip at the library or somewhere else around town, but if you tell her it’s not true, she’ll believe you. I don’t know how we’ll explain the bruises, maybe just say you bumped into a wall or slipped or something at work?
“’Santiago told me what happened. What he saw when he went outside. Your Ma, she’s a strong, tough woman, but she won’t be able to take the idea of you being hurt,’ I saw the tears glisten at the corners of his eyes, ‘I won’t be able to take it if you are hurt.’
“The compassion in his voice and look upon his face released what the night had pent up inside me, ‘I’m so sorry Daddy,’ I cried, breaking down into tears. Pap didn’t say anything, just pulled me across the seat and wrapped me in his arms as the tears fell.
“I don’t know how long we sat there or how long I cried. I stopped at some point and drifted off. Pap didn’t move an inch the entire time. He just sat in silence, holding me.
“When I woke, the first bright light of dawn was reflecting off the rearview mirror. Pap was sitting just as I’d left him, staring off at the cottage. When he noticed me begin to stir he looked down at me and asked, ‘did he touch you?’
“No matter what you may have thought of my relationship with Pap, no matter how much lip I gave him, no matter how hard he was on me, I never lied to him. And with the tone of voice he was using, I knew it wasn’t the time to tell him my first even though I was afraid he’d do something that would get him in trouble.
“‘He just hit me, nothing else. I think he wanted to, but he was having some sort of problem, so he started kicking me. He was drunk and embarrassed more than anything. I should have taken better care,’ was what I told him. No different than what I told you here today.
“Pap shook his head at me. There were tears at the corners of his eyes as he said, ‘I’m sorry this happened. I’ll make it right.’
“’What are you doing to do?’
“’Don’t you worry about a thing. I’ll take care of it,’ he said, smiling down at where I was curled up in the crook of his shoulder, ‘we haven’t done this in an age,’ he said and squeezed me to him, ‘I hate to ruin it, but let’s go inside to your Ma and the little one. I’m sure they’re wondering what we’ve been sitting out here doing all night.’
“And that was the last Pap and I talked about it. Gram tried to pry information from me after seeing the bruises on my arms at breakfast. Pap had gone out to the cemetery shed, so I told her a little bit, trying not to worry her. It didn’t matter, she knew Pap, and worried about what he might do. She also knew there was no stopping him once he started, so to the best of my knowledge, she didn’t try. She stopped asking if I was alright once the bruising on my arms faded.
